I was looking through old journals a few days ago and was AMAZED by how much God has taught me over the past 3 years! Below is a top 5 list of some things I have learned…
1.) Be Intentional: The common belief is that relationships survive off of Love alone…THEY DON’T. After the first few years you may loose the “lovey dovey” feelings and all that is left may be kind of dull. But when you and your partner are intentional about making time for each other and planning weekly or monthly dates* (or whatever works for you both) then you can reignite the flames of love and companionship.
*LD (Long distance) couples I encourage you to be intentional about making a talking schedule and having weekly or monthly Skype dates where you do activities together too. I’ll make a post of LD dates that worked for Evans and I.
2.) Find your partner’s Love Language and Use it: In 1992 a man by the name of Gary Chapman wrote a book detailing 5 different ways that people receive love best. Your partner probably has 1 or 2 ways they receive love best and you should be an expert on how to best show love to them. Many times I try to think of ways I can show Evans love and he does the same for me. So we try to keep the other person’s “love tank” full for a happier and healthier relationship. Try to outdo one another in showing love (Romans 12:10, Phillipians 2:3).
3.) KEEP GOD FIRST IN YOUR LIFE (even above your significant other): When you receive fulfillment from God you won’t have unrealistic expectations for your partner to achieve. LESS UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS= LESS ARGUEMENTS (when your partner doesn’t meet your expectations) = HAPPIER RELATIONSHIP. Matthew 6:33
4.) Create an Arguement Strategy: When you’re fed up and emotional… feelings tend to get hurt. So before you argue come up with a plan. I know some couples have code words which mean the discussion stops and they will come back to it later so not to hurt each other in the heat of the moment. You could stop and pray, walk away for 5 minutes, or even wait an hour and come back. All strategies are good as long as your argument strategy is agreed upon by both of you and you address the issue in a civilized manner when emotions have subsided.
5.) Pray for one another daily: This is self explanatory, but basically prayer changes a lot in the other person (And in you) You can’t change your partner…but God can. You can only control how you respond to your partner (so pray for patience to love them well).
I love you paa! And God loves you so much more!!